How To Navigate the Holidays if Your Family is Triggering AF
During the holidays & winter months, questions like “How Do I Handle My Families’ Food and Body Image Talk?” happen almost constantly in my counseling sessions. Family and social gatherings, especially when centered around food, are often difficult to navigate whether you are chronically dieting or recovering from an eating disorder.
But you are not alone!
Many people struggle with how to respond to inappropriate comments, and the truth is: there is no right or wrong way to engage. It will all depend on the time, energy, and space of your mental health in that moment. Below are just a few examples (and definitely not an exclusive list) of ways myself and other providers encourage to respond when they happen:
Simple ignore; possibly walk away.
Say “Can we talk about something else?”
Immediately change the subject, no rationale is needed.
“(Please) Do not comment about my food or body.” *Notice the ‘please’ is not required!
“I’m listening to my body’s needs.”
“What I’m eating is none of your business.”
“That looks delicious! What are you having?”
“Have you heard about Intuitive Eating/Health at Every Size/Non Diet Approach?”
“There’s nothing wrong with being fat.”
“It’s just one day! Enjoy your food/family time/etc!”
“Excuse me, I need to (go to the bathroom, walk the dog, step outside, etc).”
“I actually made it a wellness goal to not talk about food or bodies in a negative way this year.”
“I do not appreciate _____”
Remember: You can ALWAYS decide in the moment what is the best response for you and your mental, emotional and physical health. Even as an anti-dietitian, there are times I, too, am simply too frustrated or exhausted and don’t have the space to engage. And that is OKAY! As a great friend once shared: You are not obligated to continue holiday traditions that leave you broke, overwhelmed, or tired.
Make sure to take care of YOU this holiday season.